He knows that Cael can see through him. He knows that he's looking into him, through him, and that he can see -- maybe not everything, but the important parts -- what Roman's hiding behind that icy shell he wrapped himself up in. The heartbreak, the vulnerability, the fact that for all he might seem hard and cruel, turning into a full upir had not ruined him. He was not his mother. He was just... different. He didn't even know what he was, not entirely.
But, in the moment, nothing mattered. Nothing except for the fact that all of the harsh things he could have said, Cael didn't. Instead, he just kissed him. It made those soft edges okay, drew him out so that he was melting against Cael's mouth. Roman's hand moved from the gypsy's shoulder to cup against the side of his face, and the way he kisses him is hot and desperate and agonizingly needy.
Having Cael kiss him like this, that admittance that's better than words is like a spark. Roman has always been sexual, worse after turning, and he's hard against Cael's hip as they kiss. His tongue winding with the other boy's, but it's different, it's wordless pleading, it's need he hates he's still soft enough to give into. He wanted to be cold, hard and sharp as a knife. Strong enough to not need Peter.
But the terrible truth was he was still in love with him, even as he hated him for leaving.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2013-11-05 03:59 am (UTC)But, in the moment, nothing mattered. Nothing except for the fact that all of the harsh things he could have said, Cael didn't. Instead, he just kissed him. It made those soft edges okay, drew him out so that he was melting against Cael's mouth. Roman's hand moved from the gypsy's shoulder to cup against the side of his face, and the way he kisses him is hot and desperate and agonizingly needy.
Having Cael kiss him like this, that admittance that's better than words is like a spark. Roman has always been sexual, worse after turning, and he's hard against Cael's hip as they kiss. His tongue winding with the other boy's, but it's different, it's wordless pleading, it's need he hates he's still soft enough to give into. He wanted to be cold, hard and sharp as a knife. Strong enough to not need Peter.
But the terrible truth was he was still in love with him, even as he hated him for leaving.